Convos

I got really excited one night when I checked my site meter, which I finally figured out how to download. The world map site meter showed a new visitor to my site from the middle of America. Who could that be? I wondered aloud. This was way too exciting.

The (ex)-BF comes up behind me and goes, "That's probably just someone beating on the computer with a fork."

"I resent that," I said and shooed him. "By the way, I thought up a new name for my two future dogs."

"Oh yeah? What?"

"Well, I'm going to get a ShihTzu and name it Bonky and a Pug and name it Pugsly. Bonky and Pugsly. They'll be best friends."

"Why don't you name the Shih Tzu 'Shitzy?'"

Not funny.

Feeling disenchanted, I called Sister Number One after gorging on pizza and flopping onto the couch. "I just ate a ton of pizza tonight. I'm totally beached on the couch."

"What do you mean 'beached?'"

"I mean, beached like a whale. You know, like how whales beach."

"Well, wouldn't it be whaling on the couch, then?"

"No, because whales beach on the beach. I'm beached on the couch. Don't you know about whales beaching?"

"Yeah, they lie on the beach."

"Right. So I'm beached."

"Oh." Pause.

"Are you going to use this for your blog?"

"No way. It's too stupid."

But I'm out of material.